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December 6th, 2004

02:42 pm - My life is so not cool well my life oficaly SUCKS.... like WOW.... i dont think my boyfriend loves me i think he likes someone els... and ... thats not happy... well he loves me but not as much as i love him... which makes me want to not love him but how do oyu just stop loving someone? that you really love? i do not know ... and than i had to get some stuff off my chest to this guy that really loved me and that i thought i may luv ... notice LUV and not LOVE? i dunno... it felt weird i had butterflys in my tummy... but i felt good that i wrote it to him... now the onily thing i need to do is hope he reads it... and than hope he responds... wow my friend wrote the sweetest thing about me in his DA journal... somthing about me being a sweety and than how he really liked me but i liked someone and than i dated someone els and that " theres always a line for the pretiest girls" wow thats so sweet i teard up... i feel so down... the smalest things can cheer me up... ^^ ad the littlest things can also make me burst out crying V_V oh well life gose on... iv really been slacking in school... so tonight im going to do alot of homework.. i could be good in school if i wernt so lazy >.< And im going to mbe a better person and i dunno .. everyone says im good enugh... but they dont know lol... well gthey know me well but not... i dont know thats not tthe point. wow ... my life= crappy... well thats cool things can get better or worse... i dunno ... i am worried me and dustin will not be togeather... but i want what is best for him... and if that is not being with me than that is that... but i hope he will choose to be with me ... i think i can make him happy... oh man ... this is cryingfull... meh im a big girl i can get through this little kink.. ok its not a little kink its a HUGE kink... but oh well lets be optomistic. kwa. people are weird... how simple and yet soooo friggen complex all at the same time. My tummy hurts lol... i think its from stress last time it hurt this much is when we lived with my evil step dad... thats not cool... well the bell just rang so i am going to run off to class now ^^ ttfn Current Mood: SAD

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November 26th, 2004

01:40 pm - so like dead well im like oin ss agin... cause this is the onily class that we use the computers LOL. HAPPY so like yeah and now well let me see.... ? okies well yesterday i played Buddikei 3 owie i like skinned the skin off the palm of my right hand LOL not happy... but it was sort of funny. And than yes.. well it was funny and cute ... me and Dustin were hangging out and we decided to stop having sex... but than we were fooling around... yeah he thought he had ... self controle... sigh well yeahhhh neither of us do... and i stink at spelling but thats not the point. Well i think that ... i ... i dunno ... poor me and my oh so sad spelling... sigh im going to go and do my work^^ Current Mood: blah

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November 23rd, 2004

09:38 am - well well lol Im sitting in the library killing some time. Grand... well so like yeah. Well yesterday i asked my boyfriend if he liked anyone els and or had a crush.. and he was like . . . noooo and i was like... ???? and he was all like well i know you would get really mad if i said anything els Oo and than i was like no i want to know the truth.. and than he was all like ... well no of couyrs not ... i just like to bug you... i like died lol... i mean i dont care if he thinks like oh yeah shes hot... but not like oh id like to make out with her... like ... you know what i mean... i dont want him to actually like other girls ... just thinking there attrctive is diffrent ... so i think i will make shore he knows that LOL i mean i trust him sooooo much ^^ so that is good... sigh im trying to get piccys of haloness ... what els? well nothing really. so im going to go Current Mood: ditzy

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November 22nd, 2004

02:49 pm - lol well im sitting here doing nothing ... im taing PE right now woo hoo... not not verry fun... im gunna go home and curl up in my bed and have a nap... *puuurs softly* lol and what else? lemme think ... well i am like so inlove... i just keep falling more and more in love with Dustin its crazy >.< oh welll .... what is one to do? i think it is good as long as he stays intrested lol ^^ but that is all i want to and need to write other than Red vs blue is like so friggen funny ^^ Current Mood: curious Current Music: nothing

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November 19th, 2004

11:24 am - Wow long time no write >. LOL i havent writen for like a while... well that could possibly be because i dont have the internet at home. Well yeah whats new? Well see i dont know whats new... lol well i could complain about alot of things like Xmass and how hard it is t like get gifts for everyone. and the money to get the gifts for everyone ... >.< but i can do it. I know what imm getting the peoples i adores. well at least i think i do. Yeah and what else. well theres this guy i wont say his name cause thats mean and i dont care to say his name anyways... but this guy... has ben asking me for sex for the longest time so i decided to delete him a while ago... and than i got my boyfriend and thought he would be better and that we could be friends and drop the whole sex thing.... yeah right... I readd him to my msn and hes all like whats new and such and i tell him... like i have a bf and i love him verry much, and hes all like cool cool... and the convo starts all nice and good, and than its all like hay alexa you know i really want to be close to you... and i was like ... ? and hes all like you are really like hot and you have alot to offer, ... and i was like ...? and he was all like implying he regreted not going out with me and i said ha ha to bad its to late. and than he was all like iv really been thinking about that kiss... (cause i said id give him a kiss if i ever saw him again) and i said yeah to bad i have a boyfriend. and he was all like yeah but i really wanna feel oyu close to me and blah blah blah... and i was like .... uhhh ... and than he was like we should have sex... and i was like no way ... i love dustin so much, and hes all like comeon how attached could you be youv onily been going out for 2 weeks... (this all happend a few weeks ago but a bunch of stuff just came up) And i was like well i do i would never cheat on him... i love him and dont want to lose him... and than scotts all like its not cheating if no one looses... and i was like .... i lose and Dustin loses. And he just kept going... and i was like if you had a girlfriend and i didnt have a boyfriend... i would never think of asking you for sex... (cause i wouldnt to begin with) And he was like well whatever. and than i blocked and deleited him once again. .... But the thing that really pissed me off... like sooo badlly was that his exe one of my best friends went over to his place and was all like hay lets have sex... and he was like no... i really like someone and im thinking of asking her out .... that made me sooooooooo mad.... he thinks that he can gat mad at him for not having sex with him when im dating some guy i absalutly love and adore ... and he can just say no to his ex just cause he has a crush on some girl he may ask out..... WHAT A PRICK.... AH I used to like him so he thinks he can still like own me... but i liked him at like the begiing of gr 10. AH it makes me mad... but im going to go find my friends and hang out... or wait for them to find me ... naw ill go find them in a sec... so yes things are teh good... as long as there is no creepers. and yeah what else... nothing at all lol Tah tah for now ^^ Current Mood: hungry Current Music: Notihnig

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November 12th, 2004

12:50 pm - Friday woo hoo LOLwell its fridayand once again im like doing my essay... sigh this thing is so looong... but thats cool.Owie my teeth hurt i just ate the nastyest hardest tochew candy ever >.< lol. Iplayed haloyesterdaywith the love of my life... it was......itwas awful i like suck at thatgame and hes like pro... hes above pro... hes like scary good... lol iwishi were half the halo player he is*sits in awe of his amaizingness*lol, but yeah i kept on dying... but iget to play tommorow and try to get him... HA HAH AHA ihave no real life...noido ... noidunno... LOL well what els... lol me and dustin talked about this and yeah he dosnt buckle under stress lol ithink i was just being really paranoid... But i was acting a little off thatday. And i decided like he said like not to worry... cause than iwont enjoy what we have and ill allways be worried about being apart and than its like well we may as well be... not that imsaying thatim just sayuing like ... i shouldnt worry... and if idont worry im shore ill be a better little gf^^ Sigh so nows i100% happy and not worrying lol... hmmmtoday imgunna nap...i stayed up sooooo late doing my essay.... oh man its a harsh world lol.... but not toooo late just like 2 am but still considdring i get up at 7 am its kindda harsh. lol Noiwont complainpeople have it worse. hayijust relized how bad the space bar is and how its like slurring my words togeather LOL...oh wellwell im gunna goand finish my essay ^^ (my journals are lame bibble babbles) Current Mood: wanting to be good at halo Current Music: mixy

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November 10th, 2004

10:08 pm - Tra la la la Hola lol, I am in S.S once again.. and i am doing a project... oh yes good times... yes so every thing is well with me and d lol d... oie i love him so much hes so good to me and he seems to really love me but he seems to buckle under stress but it dosnt bug me... as long as im not a stress for him... i just like to be there for him... ^^ And i know that he likes that ^^ mrew wow i talk about him alot... meh. Halo 2 looks cool ^^ happy .. i cant wait to play... what else yeah i think i may tommorow if D comes over.. ^^ happy and tonight i get to babysit over night from 5 oclock today... wow alot of babysitting .. oh well a merry x mas for my friends he he he he. lol what els oh hmmm... well not alot... just i have to go to an assembly soon... thats happyish... cause its for remembeence day.. so sad. but yeah nad what els... er i know theres more... whats new... AH i cant think of anything... ah i need to get togeather with my friends more often.. well alaina is coming over today HAPPY actually i get to meet her at the front at 12 30... cool and than i still need to see my friend sonja... i misss her soooo much >.< and yeah ... what else nothing really but yeah i hope tonight gose well and that i get to play halo tommorow.... such a cool looking game HA HA HA HA the puma ... *shakes head* puma .... lol i have to much free time lol... actually i think i need to go do some work ... yeah thats what ill do .. i hope that nmo one really reads this all i do is babble... alot ... but yeah im off iv run outta things to say ^^ lexa Current Mood: naughty

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01:03 am - teh Love well now I'm like better i guess... I'm not so worred about my boyfriend breaking up woth me.. it just seems he was just being diffrent that like one time.. i dunno he was really caring and sweet after.. i dunno... and he is coming over toda for dinner and than yeah good times i really love him... hes really such a kind person... sigh... oh well yay happy halo lol... oh my i really wanna play that game... so yeah what else is new... oh i have to do my essay... and yeah and.. glarg work on a Tae Kwan Do Point chart... sigh i want to but i dont ... oh well.. im doing it for my boyfriend cause he teaches tkd and i can sort of draw so im making his point chart.. ..no it makes me happy... i like to do things for him it makes me happy. Im in s.s class right now and im just looking stuff up about the war. Well yes well Im off ... oh and i hope that D.. (waht ill call my bf) dosnt get mad at me or anything lol and yes ill write later or somthing... Current Mood: blank

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November 8th, 2004

08:21 pm - So worried Well here i am typing it up... im not really good at this .. but ill try... well yeah.. im going to sdd some friends to read or to read theres lol. Well lets see... today i was all worried cause yesterday i wasnt acting myself wich i think threw my boyfriend off a little... so now im worried hes gunna like end things... but i talked to one of my verry good friends who said i was looknig to far into it and that i was to worried... oh i hope so... hes a really awsome guy... like in my opinion there is no better... hes really sweet cute... hot *giggles* caring genorous... to genorous.. (cant spell) hes got an awsome personality hes funny hes loving and he loves video games... lol and much more.. i really like his family i dont know if they like me... i think they do... but whatever... i just dont want to lose him... i know we not be togeather forever... but i love him so much and would like to hold on to him as long as possible... ... oh man he means so much to me... he says the sweetest things to me.. and he seems to really love me... but than i think is he so sweet that he would act like he loves me just so he dosnt hurt me? oh man see now im thinking to much LOL.... cause you can tell when hes humaring you... and he sort of has been .... but maybe its cause i was acting odd... its cause i drank coffe in the morning and it makes my angzitey act weird lol i can not spell at all but its cool... yeah but enugh about being all worried... Im shore if he breaks up woth me he has a good resson... i think ... well yeah iv been making charechters up for a new manga im gunna be making... good times... ^^ and people already wanna buye the charechters LOL thats fun ... cause im thinking of selling my art over the enternet lol how cool am i? ... *roles eyes* WOW i have an essay due in 2 days and i havent done verry much... i think ill go do that ttfn lexa Current Mood: sleepy Current Music: Halo

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